My boyfriend's mom speaks her love through food, not words

When my boyfriend's mother and I first met, we couldn't speak the same language. I'm American and she's Italian, and though we've both been learning each other's tongues, she has another way to communicate: food. She pays attention to my preferences, and that care makes me feel seen in a way words alone might not.

Growing up, I hated onions. My mom always added them to jarred tomato sauce, and even when I asked for them to be put on after I served myself, they were on my plate. I also felt my mother didn't know the foods I liked — she once insisted I loved mushrooms and brought a chocolate cake for my birthday when I prefer carrot cake.

My boyfriend's mom began asking which dishes I enjoyed, what was too spicy, and what flavors I preferred. She seems to keep a mental notebook: she planted dill and cilantro even though she doesn't eat them, stocks the fridge with foods we like, keeps a bottle of balsamic under the sink for me, and stashes my preferred spices and teas for visits.

United States, Italy

boyfriend's mother, food, language barrier, italian, american, onions, mushrooms, dill, cilantro, balsamic