Woman says she feels like a fraud at her husband’s Church of England congregation

A woman in her 50s told the Guardian she adores her husband but feels like a fraud attending his Church of England congregation. They met eight years ago, and he has become a pillar of the church community while she feels increasingly alienated. She described herself as a low‑church Protestant who “sort of believe[s] in God”, finds spirituality in nature and thinks Christ was “simply a good man”, whereas her husband believes.

He has not imposed his views, but she resents the emphasis on theology, hymns and rituals and says she mouths words she does not believe. The couple met after difficult first marriages, their friendship groups do not mix well, and she has suggested trying the Quakers, which made her husband uncomfortable.

UK Council for Psychotherapy‑registered psychotherapist Jacquie Keelan told her it was “understandable your letter felt a bit despairing given the feelings you express about the church you go to: alienated, meaningless, fraud.

Key Topics

Culture, Quakers, Jacquie Keelan, Annalisa Barbieri, Nature Spirituality